Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Having a baby - with midwives...

I have to start somewhere and the birth of my daughter is the most life defining moment I have ever had. But to be fair to the whole story, I will actually begin with the pregnancy, and some of the defining moments prior to her actual birth.

It starts a few years ago when I proposed the idea to my husband that having a baby is something I did not want to miss in my life experience. After trying for a while and getting a little desperate, I started checking in on fertility clinics. Well, as luck would have it our vacation to Maui, was all the fertility clinic I needed.

I found out I was pregnant while I was in training for a century bike ride for Team in Training for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. I got a bit nervous riding as vigorously as I was while in the beginning stages of pregnancy. Fortunately, I did not get really sick, just mild nausea. My doctor assured me that as long as I did not overheat I would be fine.

Choosing an obstetrician and deciding where to have my baby was one of the first things I had to do. Both my sisters had to have cesarean sections with all of their babies because of various "complications" so I assumed I would not be able to have my baby naturally as well. My husband was a 10 pound baby and is 6'6" so I figured I would have a "too big baby" as well. One of my sister's 10 pound 11 ounce babies was "too big" and she would have died in childbirth so her doctor said after many hours of labor. They said her pelvis was not for having babies. The other sister had pre-eclampsia and became unstable during labor so she had to have a c-section. The rest of their babies were planned c-sections.

With that history I signed up with a local well rated hospital with the best neonate unit in the area (just in case). I chose a woman doctor because I did not want a man (not being sexist) to deliver my baby. I wanted a woman who has the same parts and who has gone through with what I was about to go through - well she had not had a baby yet, but come to find out at my four month visit she was pregnant as well just two weeks behind me - cool we were going through it together.

During the months leading up, my husband asked my why I wanted to have my baby in a hospital - "it's not like your sick, you're just having a baby" he said. Side note, he was born at home with a midwife and his father delivered him. Apparently, in England after the first normal childbirth a woman may give birth at home if the pregnancy is normal (something like that). It got me thinking - why not do some reading about home birth. My pregnancy was going along beautifully, and I was getting more and more uneasy with having a baby at a hospital. I registered for an online birth course for natural childbirth, got a book on Hypnobirthing, and I got a book called Painless Childbirth. All of this was very empowering.

Back to my doctor, at my six month visit, she informed me that she would not be able to attend my birth because of her pregnancy and that one of her colleagues would attend (which one who knows - might even be a man I never met - oh yea :( At that point I was really uneasy, and feeling like this is not the birthing experience I wanted, and with the books I was reading I was seeing how a beautiful birthing experience could be.

I inquired on a local waterbirth center and got a consultation to meet the midwives - that is where my story really starts.

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